Change Your Language, Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

Positive or negative? Fixed or growth? I used to believe you either thought positively or negatively and that your thoughts were your thoughts and you just got on with it. Obviously I find that hilarious now, given I personally believe our mindset is the most powerful tool we have at our disposal for success, happiness and basically getting everything we want - when we use it to our benefit of course. In fact, I am confident enough to say there is nothing that influences our thoughts, our decisions and our quality of life more than our mindset. Without a doubt, our mindset can help us spot opportunities and provide us with immense motivation and drive but when allowed to, it can also trap us in self-defeating cycles, destructive thinking patterns and keeps us more stuck than Gorilla Glue!

So what exactly am I going on about? Simply put, your mindset is a collection of thoughts and beliefs that shape your thought processes. These processes affect how you think, what you feel, and what you do. Your mindset holds all of the unconscious assumptions you make about the world and as a result, impact how you make sense of life based on your experiences of the world, your environment and the ideas and beliefs modelled from those you interacted the most with during your life. Based on these beliefs the mindset is responsible for how you interpret and react to what happens to you and around you.

Basically and with total honesty, I think it is clear that mindset has everything to do with perspective and I used to have a shockingly negative outlook on many things and for many years. I seemed to fall from one life disaster to another and when things were good, I’d be like, “well this is too good to be true, it won’t last” and guess what, It never lasted. I would always anticipate the next pile of crap delivery so I didn’t enjoy the good through expecting the bad and life was exhausting. During a particularly bad life drama I went to stay with my cousin and it was there I had my thought process brutally challenged. I mean, he was relentless in trying to get through to me and he was really pissing me off. I was also massively sceptical but I trusted him and decided I had nothing to lose (see, negative). I took the advice he gave me and I listened to the resources he provided me. I rolled my eyes at first but it didn’t take long at all to start feeling the benefits. I was learning so much and had applied so many positive things, my life changed in a way I hadn’t expected and so did I. I loved the new me. I was unstoppable, invincible and my awesome mindset opened up a world of opportunity and massively improved my physical and emotional health. I have many reasons to be grateful for my cousin and this is definitely one of them. He showed me how to change my life and I want to pay that kindness forward by showing you how you can change yours. I will share with you the first mindset changing techniques I personally used so you can immediately apply them to your own life. They are not one off ‘tricks’ but a whole new mind health lifestyle. These are by no means all the techniques at your disposal for creating your own powerful mindset however they are rapid, effective, a lot of fun and a great place to start. It time to get piss your pants excited…

I started practicing the art of being grateful. High fiving all over the place for gratitude! I know this is really cheesy but seriously…Gratitude = Great Attitude…I did warn you. Being grateful was not something I thought would change my life and I am so grateful I was wrong. I started by writing down 3 things I was grateful for every night and would go to sleep thinking about 3 things I was looking forward to about tomorrow. I would also set myself a small goal, sometimes it was as simple as just picking the clothes up from the floordrobe and putting them away but it was always something I knew would feel good once I completed it. I then increased my daily gratitude list and added in 1 magic moment. The magic moments I collected for a year and then read them all. The feeling it gave me was incredible and it reminded me of so many amazing memories that could so easily have been lost in my misery. I highly recommend doing this for yourself or for someone special to you. I literally celebrate gratitude and how it feels to be grateful especially during times of adversity. When you learn to be grateful for the learning in every experience, there isn’t much that can rock you.

I changed my physiology and my story. I learnt that what I held in my mind affected me physically and vice versa. It made total sense once somebody pointed it out. I then got a much deeper understanding of this during my practitioner certification and discovered this is referred to as ‘state’ in NLP. States affect our capabilities and are something we produce from within. I noticed how the weight of my thoughts and how I was or wasn’t dealing with things was reflected in my physical body and how I carried myself. I also noticed how the language I used fed in to my negativity on an unconscious level and continued the cycle. I started exercising and I instantly felt the benefits of those wonderful endorphins. I stood taller and looked around me instead of down. I smiled more, danced more and with practice, I could instantly change my state just by recalling something hilarious from the past. When people asked me how me how I was, I changed my response from “not bad” to “I’m really good thanks” and extended that it in to other areas of conversation. I focused on discussing the positive things happening in my life and I changed the language I projected in to the world and how I spoke to myself.

I stopped blaming others for how I felt. When this concept was first introduced to me, I had quite a hard time understanding and accepting how I was responsible for bringing all the crap I had going on in my life on myself! Why on earth would I do that? Obviously it was he/she/it that was making me angry or making me cry. It was clearly their actions and this whole situation that resulted in this massive inconvenience in my life and made me react this way. Sound familiar? Here’s the not so breaking news…nobody can make you feel anything or make you react a certain way. You choose that all by yourself and I was consistently giving 100% control of my feelings to someone or something else. I had to take responsibility for my emotional reactions and once I did, I learnt how to effectively manage my emotions, build emotional resilience and reduce the negative feelings I was consistently carrying around with me. My life became simpler and my anxiety greatly reduced. I cared less about what other people thought and I got to know myself better. It also enabled me to rapidly let go of negativity which had huge benefits to my energy levels! I am literally bursting to tell you that amazing things really do happen when you stop blaming others.

I started living in moment and opened myself up to new experiences. I discovered that when I was living more in the moment I did not literally become my thoughts but instead I became more of an observer. What do I mean by this? Well, many of us live a lot of life dwelling on the past or being anxious about the future and I was no different to that. There is no doubt that this kind of thinking takes away appreciation for what you have right now in this moment, the only space in time that actually exists. Surely you want every opportunity for enjoyment and to experience the most out of life, right? To feel happy, content, loved, grateful and free from your pestering thoughts. I know very well not every moment may be good but you can certainly create something good from every moment if you want to. I tried many new experiences by saying yes to doing something different, going somewhere different and networking with different people. Some things I would never do again but I am glad I did them all. I found that changing my environment opened up new opportunities and learning to my life. At times, it also provided me with hilarious tales I can recount for years to come and lifelong memories I can continue to enjoy.

Your mindset will become your greatest SuperPower and you will notice the effects more rapidly than you could have imagined. You are about to become stronger and more powerful than you ever thought possible and I honestly couldn’t be more excited for your transformation if I tried. Change your language, change your mind, change your life...

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